How To Ask Your Child About Their Day

When asking their children about their day, a lot of parents end up with the answer "I don't know" or receive one word answers. Responses like “good” or “fine”, don’t sound encouraging and don’t tell you a lot about your child’s day. This is totally normal and something many parents experience, as a result of the way children think. 

Why you get "I don't know" as an answer

Research (1) shows that a child learns and reacts better when they are having fun. This applies to when asking them questions and starting conversations with them, too. Children have curious minds. They like to explore and use their imagination. A simple question like "how was your day?'' would not excite them and spark a conversation. For example, kids would much rather sleep on colorful bedding or beds that are themed as their favorite movie character, whereas adults prefer a more simple aesthetic. The fact of the matter is kids don't like plain conversations. Children must be entertained and to do that you will need to ask them questions that grab their attention. You need to find a subject that sparks a conversation with you and your child. 

How to get kids talking

The environment you set your kids in can help with breaking the conversation barrier. It is ideal that you create a space in the home that is an outlet for your child. There are a variety of beds and bedroom sets that can help with that. Other spaces you can create that will be seen as a safe, welcoming environment for conversation is a playroom or at meal time. Here are some  tables that can be the perfect place to sit down on their level and hear about their day. 

Instead of "how was your day" ask your child these questions.

Here are some alternative ways to ask your children about their day to encourage full and enthusiastic answers. These are questions you can ask your child if you want an engaging conversation with them. The questions can spark an interest from what they did today by focusing on certain subjects. 

-What did you do during recess today?

Recess is one of the more fun times during a child's day at school so bringing it up when asking a question can lead to an interesting conversation you two could share. Another good topic to bring up are your child's friends.

-Who was that friend you were talking to?

The best part of school is making new friends that your children may create lasting relationships with. Including their friends in your questions will definitely get your child's attention.

-What did you dream about today?

There are many ways to connect with your child’s everyday life. It just takes time to figure them out.

Talking to a child is not as easy as it sounds, but if you follow these tips, you might have an easier time communicating with your children. You can always talk about things your child enjoys, like toys and cartoons, to add further interests to your conversation. Learning to talk to your children takes time and patience but once you get the hang of it, it will all be worth it.

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(1) Kimberly Zapata. Kids Learn When They're Having Fun. Healthline Sept. 2020. https://www.healthline.com/health/the-importance-of-play